calm kind of violent

by Elkling

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1.
an okay year 03:41
I bought some paper a and pack of pens get out my thoughts in some corner space The words never came, my mind was silent Searching for thoughts that I misplaced I smoked a little and smoked some too me and the people I met up here I met some women, none like you I'd say over all it was an okay year I never gave a shit about the things I said when I was running my mouth but the whole damn world seems brighter now and I can't figure it out I wore a loose white hospital gown and I drank chicken broth and apple juice they cleaned my veins and calmed me down and I counted minutes till I could speak to you you kissed my forehead and said I’d be fine but I knew you only did it to keep me alive I watched you walk off and turn out the lights and I closed my eyes and swallowed my mind I never gave a shit about the things I did to silence my doubt poison burned a hole that still leaks now and I gave up ten years for 60 pills in my mouth honey you always said I could make it If I but put down the bottle and kept singing Well I feel capable of living Overall It was an okay, an okay year
2.
one long leg 02:41
Drove through the moments that she was holding in funny how the road at night can clear your head I been on this mountain since I can remember when You were looking tragic the moment you walked in hair grows long the days grows shorter cut it all off and go along turn around only when you got too this town is tapped let's get gone she was sitting etching sketching on my bed and I was pouring words from the thoughts into the air know that she’ll be leaving by the week’s end funny how some things, oh, never go as planned twice I tried to make her my lover, she stole everything I had this time it’ll be war for turning back oh, goodbye then. oh, one long leg.
3.
metonymy 03:04
pardon me, while I draw the moon from the crescents under your eyes The solemn breath is twice removed What a fatal compromise Let's have a drink for the lonely one In his house on stilts by the ocean front A passing storm might steal the sun Even as it shines on all of us even as he shines Fading steps as cold as ice a doorway leaks fluorescent light a man made mirror marketing my mind Ephemeral eternity beckons to me hopelessly as I am not the man who gives meaning to the stars and none of you are the falling leaves are carving rain and I'm aware of all your sighs allow me now to touch you again and I'll pull the thorns from your side who are you to say it's not enough if you have a question why not ask us? the moon is heavy, as the waves are rough but your last lesson will come soon love Fading steps as cold as ice a doorway leaks fluorescent light a man made mirror marketing my mind Ephemeral eternity beckons to me hopelessly as I am not the man who gives meaning to the stars and none of you are
4.
hibiscus 04:28
The friction between your lips and teeth reminds me of a rug defiant unless there’s some weight upon you in the moment you’re definitely smiling the moon was pulling both of us in the womb before we arrived alive the deep blue that runs in me runs in you I felt it when you read your diary and I drank the hibiscus you poured for me and listened to you in the shower singing my damn leg shook the whole time and my hands fiddled with the tea clasps metal wires I sat with you in the park with the wind and we smoked several cigarettes they look so much different curled in the index of those sharp and small hands I told you about the hospital and my insides and your eyes were locked on mine there was silence for a while but you said thank you just the same and we walked for sometime and I drank the hibiscus you poured for me and listened to you in the shower singing and my damn leg shook the whole time and my hands fiddled with the tea clasps metal wires maybe you should run baby you should run from me I am a mind divided maybe you should run baby you should run from me I am calm kind of violent
5.
Well I come from a battle of the fault lines and in this place I read the danger in black and white I have felt the pain of too many eyes meeting mine and I have loved the woods and walking in them at night And there is always someone I have not met So the poems and pens write wounds onto my hollow cobbler’s chest Oh those words that I have yet to smith and always regret This life of revisions is an impossible test I come from anywhere my feet do roam anywhere I want to go I call home I come from the cops in my granny’s kitchen and yes I come from cell division I come from a trist in the basement and I come from wanton defacement I come from a single mother searching for love in another never noticing her son’s And there is always someone I have not met While the poems and pens write wounds onto my hollow cobbler’s chest Oh those words that I have yet to smith and always regret This life of revisions is an impossible test I come from diminished longing and I come from unfinished songs

credits

released December 23, 2013

I'd like to sincerely thank some supreme cosmic entity for my opportunity to create anything at all. Also, much love to my dear friend Jairo Robles for the artwork. My roommate and all things technical connoisseur Zach Herron did the mastering, thank you as well friend. Also, all of the people I have met and digested these past two years, you are as much a part of these songs as I am.

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Elkling Cullowhee, North Carolina

Christopher White

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